There are times when we can feel unfulfilled unsatisfied and overly exhausted as if we had accomplished nothing that day, that month and as if another year just slipped by. The other day I had to stop my thought process as I was thinking back on this past year and I thought to myself wow 2 more years to 2020, and then I realized wait a second its going to be 2019. No I did not go through the year thinking it was 2017, but I guess it just takes a while for it to sink in and take it all in and realize that another year just passed by. 2019 will be here in 32 days.
So I decided that before I start thinking about next year and all the things I want to accomplish in 2019 that I am going to take a moment and sit and reflect and give myself a pat on the back for all the things that I accomplished this year.
I believe that stopping to take a moment and reflect and maybe even celebrate all that you have accomplished, learned, and changes made and letting them sink in, not only will it give your confidence a boost, but it will give you the energy and encouragement you need to set those new goals for the coming year. I think it is important that we allow ourselves a breather before moving on to the next task. We are constantly on go go go mode that we forget to breathe. We do and accomplish so much yet we fail to acknowledge and celebrate those victories no matter how big or small.
I think we live in a culture of hustle and bustle and noise and instant gratification that does not allow space or time to sit and reflect and be present in the moment. We get so caught up living in the future and what ‘needs’ to get done that we miss out on the present moment. Our heads are filled with to do lists and new apps come out every day on how to increase our productivity.
Now don’t get me wrong, I value being productive, but let's set something straight “we are human beings, not human doings” as Tony Robins puts it. Now tell me, of those many things that ‘need’ to get done how many of them bring you joy, how many of them will increase your self worth, how many of them will bring honor to yourself your family and God or that higher power? Now you notice I put quotations on the word need, reason being that often times we do what we ‘have or need’ to do versus what is truly important. Of the things that you need to do, how many of those things will matter 5 years from now? How many of those will just consume your energy and just be another check off your list? How many of those things get you to where you want to be and who you want to become?
Now I know what you might be thinking if you are anything like me, Type A personality, a perfectionist, multitasker, things have order, things need to be clean and you are probably thinking of 10 million other things that need to get done while you are doing the things that you already have on your to do list. Your brain does not shut off. You are probably already thinking of your 2019 resolutions. To that perfectionist, to that anxious person, to that high achiever, I have some words of advice.
I have been reading this book, You’re Loved No Matter What, Freeing your Heart from the Need to be Perfect, by Halley Gert. Now this book has taught me some important lessons on letting go of some of that perfectionism and the need for approval. We get so caught up in everything that we need to do and what hasn’t been done because of our high expectations that we go to bed with such labels in our head such as bad wife, bad friend, bad Christian and we go to bed anxious and exhausted. This book encourages the reader to pursue of a life of excellence not perfection and to seek approval from God to do the things that should get done rather than the other way around and doing tireless perfectionist work and seeking approval from others. Now for those of you that are of different faith or atheist, you could connect with your higher power or yourself and ask are the things I need to do are they to get recognition, are they to make myself feel better, do they feed the need for perfection, or will these things add value and joy to those around me, do I freely give of my time and gifts without begrudging the task at hand? So let’s brake down what it means to live a life of excellence. Excellence is doing what you can with what you have where you are as you are. Ultimately what this means is being present, and deliberate with your time, your love your energy and your gifts. It means cutting yourself some slack, loving yourself, allowing others to help you . Lastly it means taking the time to acknowledge all that you have accomplished, how you have changed in a positive way hopefully, and celebrating those small or big victories.
What did you accomplish in 2018? If you feel like you didn’t accomplish much think harder little things count, they add up. If you still don’t feel very accomplished then maybe this can serve as a reflection of how you can be more deliberate and intentional with your time. Choose what is important, think of your values.
Remember YOU are awesome!
